Date Number Four

I'm falling behind. I know. But the goods news is that yesterday, I had date number four. It WOULD have been on Friday night if I had not had an awful cold - I wasn't incapacitated or anything, I just would have made a terrible (mucus-filled) first impression. Fortunately we were able to reschedule, and so on Sunday, I had lunch with number four and only a tiny bit of nasal congestion.

From the beginning, this guy felt different. He never felt like a blind date or like he should be a part of this project. For one thing, we don't have any mutual friends - he was an eHarmony match. For another thing, we chatted a fair amount online before meeting. But he said that I can blog about him as long as I give him "an awesome pseudonym, like Chance McGovern, or something."

So Chance and I met for lunch at a Vietnamese restaurant in St. Paul. Throughout the process of deciding where to meet, he demonstrated an eclectic taste in food and extensive knowledge of restaurants that I can definitely appreciate. This particular restaurant, called Ngon, is on University in St. Paul and is absolutely adorable.

I don't know how to start about Chance without sounding really girly...He's pretty great. He's intelligent, and witty, and pretty darn good-looking (which I already knew, of course, from his eHarmony pictures). He immediately understood why my fish is named Tobias. He actually knows the show Sports Night, which surprised me and also made my heart flutter a bit. He's a writer. He seemed genuinely interested in what I was saying, even when I was talking about ridiculous things (I tend to ramble a bit when I'm nervous). We seem to have a lot in common.

He's so great, in fact, that I wonder if I'm good enough for him! I'm not trying to second guess myself or anything, I just don't know how I came across. Does he think I'm intelligent, or did I sound dumb? He asked me if I collect anything, which took me off on a whole long spiel - Did that make me sound weird? Was my hair too frizzy? Was I wearing too much make-up? I just...I got all nervous! That's so unlike me, too. I'm usually a fairly confident person. But he's the one that ended the date, and while he DID hug me, it was one of those half-hearted one-arm hugs. So I'm left feeling like a 1950's teenager, chewing my nails and wondering if he'll call me.

Of course, if he's reading this, I'm sure that last paragraph didn't help me sound "normal." Chance, if you're reading this, you're awesome. And I'm committed to being as honest as possible in this blog, so I feel like that last paragraph needs to stay, even if it makes me sound crazy. I hope you had a thrilling time with your laundry on Sunday (I have two loads going right now, finally) and I'd love to see you again.

Friends, this project is hard. Seriously. I've had four dates so far this year and that's more dates than I've had in the past four years combined. I feel like I'm straddling  this weird line between "the only way I'll ever meet someone is to put myself out there like this" and "the kind of person I want to be with would think this project was ridiculous and probably discount me immediately." I don't know what to do at this point. I don't have any future dates lined up. I don't want to HAVE to have any future dates lined up! It's only February 6th...How am I questioning this so much already?